I appear to have forgotten how to date.
Perhaps dating’s not the right word actually – because as well you know, my love life hasn’t exactly been barren for the past couple of years – but I think I’ve forgotten how to see further than the first date.
In recent weeks, flirtations have occurred with an actor (I know. I will never learn.) which has since evolved to Friday night pub times and facebook messaging to the extreme, finally resulting in a cheeky fb message a few days ago saying;
‘Here’s my number – if you were to use it, I’m sure it wouldn’t jeopardise our working relationship…’
So of course (I was drunk) I instantly texted something equally cheeky (I was DRUNK) and since then… texting to the extreme.
My sources tell me this is the kind of behaviour that will soon be followed by a date, then dating, then…
Herein lies my problem. I spent all of last year essentially shagging around and swearing off meaningful relationships. My good buddy Blondie did the same (as did Nicole but she failed miserably so we’re going to glaze over that) and as a result we have turned ourselves into emotionally unavailable commitment-phobes.
It just happened again!!! Text from super keen actor man;
‘So… want to grab some dinner? Nice outfit today by the way’
Curse you West End Live. Curse you for giving me a reason to dress up all fabulous around actor types. And curse the sun for coming out. Sunglasses always make me appear more fabulous than usual. The bedraggled Ritzi of yesterday wouldn’t be getting so much attention.
I do recall stating on here, in writing, that I was only ever going to properly date again if I felt that kind of stomach clenching gooey thrill of real proper romance.
Well my stomach is pretty much fine, but I am liking the attentive attentions and whatnot. Who knows what it might turn into? Should I be writing this off so early? But then I surely can’t go against all my previously stated rules and date another actor, can I? Am I thinking about this too much??!?!?!
Frankly, I have a lot of work to do. I shouldn’t go for dinner with this guy. I definitely should be reading reviews and coordinating audition schedules and confirming networking dates for NYC and reading scripts and…
Oh bugger it I’m texting back.