I’d Like To Thank, Castmembers, Condoms and Coffee…

VOTE RITZI! (Subliminal messaging along these lines shall appear throughout)

Well would you look at that? I only got shortlisted for a Cosmo Blog Award! And I discovered this rather later than the rest of the world, it appears.

I was home late (been to the theatre – of course) and because I live in the black hole of nothingness that is South West London, I had no phone signal, and so twitter was having some issues. At last, a teeny tiny tweet makes it through:

BigFashionista: Where is @RitziCortez? Does she know?

Oh bloody hell, do I know what? About half an hour of fruitless refreshing later, I got a phonecall (sure, no twitter but that works) from Blondie.

‘Congratulations!’ she shrieks as only she can.

ON WHAT????

Oh… Oh? Oooooooh!

Needless to say, after that I actually got my slightly drunken self out of bed and whipped open the laptop.

VOTE RITZI!

I’m so freakin honoured to be in that (rather short) shortlist of 8 amazingly awesome blogs, some of which have names which made me lol a little bit.

I started this blog almost 2 years ago now when I was temping in a between jobs job. At the time I was working with a guy I’d known for years, who bounded into the office one morning armed with a piece of information that would entertain us for days.An accquaintance, it seemed, was the writer of an anonymous book of sexcapades. She didn’t tell him her alias, but she told him about the cover art, and after about three days of trawling through Amazon, Foyles and Borders, we came across THIS, and shortly after discovered that the book was born from a rather sordid blog.

Life returned to normal all to briefly, and then one day I was unceremoniously dumped in a Weatherspoons on my lunch hour, and everything changed.

I read ‘Sienna’s Lovers’ from virtual cover to cover, and then discovered more blogs and more hilarious stories, and remembered that before my twat of an ex, I’d had that kind of life. To a reader, it was gold, and no one was writing it down. So I clicked the button on the top of the screen prompting me to start up my own sordid storydeck, and ‘Climbing Ritzi’s Ladder’ was born.

I started off on Blog.co.uk, which I still say is a damn good site. I met the fabulous Big Fashionista there (also nominated. She doesn’t say cock as much as I do, but she does post gratuitous pictures of hot half naked men every Friday) and I wouldn’t be here today if I hadn’t spent my first 6 months blogging every ridiculous thought that sprung into my head on that site.

There have been some close calls – some people have found out about and not all of them have been happy about it, but whaaaatever. I’ve never compromised what I write, and I always write the truth (sometimes a little too much truth) which has resulted in such tales as many rounds of Ensemble Bingo, unexpected anal obsessed Irishman, accidental Hudson River Park Antics and the odd deep rooted reflection on identity.

VOTE RITZI!

So, while I’m super grateful to have been shortlisted for this prestigious award that my mum recently glossed over the details of when telling my father about it, there is one teeeeeny favour I need to ask.

Can you go here please? Just for a sec? And vote your arse off for Climbing Ritzis Ladder (yes, they missed the apostrophe. I’m not holding it against em)

THANKS WORLD! I LOVES YA!

RitziCx